hiya, i married my man, when i was 17yrs old. we have been married 43yrs,and still very much in love.this is what my mum told me,she was married 62yrs, till she died. never go to bed arguing,always make up, before you sleep.always work together, with house work/kids/ shopping.never go out with your mates on a night out.that's either one of you.always make sure you go out together once a week,for a night to relax.always talk to each other,don't bottle things up,and always do things together,as a loving couple.i followed these bits of advice,and i could not be happier, kids now adays, don't put much into there relationships,that's why there is so many kids without one of there parents.good luck.xHappy couples, why do you think your relationship is such a success?
What i do:
1. Communicate: Talk to your partner about sexual problems and feelings you may have to see how you can work them out together.EX: If you have a desire to use sex toys, you should share this with him or her!
2. Avoid arguments: Choose your battles to have more positive feelings towards your partner.
3. Think positively about sex: Don't think of sex as a chore, but instead as a fun and loving experience that you can share.
4. Spend time together: Get away from the hectic pace of life and just have fun together to get your spark back.
5. Show affection: Outside of the bedroom, show affection to your partner, and you'll be more attracted to them sexually.
6. Do something new: Introduce a little novelty into your lives together, and you'll produce dopamine, a chemical that helps fuel sex drive.
7. Take a vacation: Sometimes the hectic pace of daily life can get in the way of sex, so step out of your usual routine to spice things up.
8. Take a deep breath: The scent of your partner's sweat can be a booster for your sex drive.
9. Go out on a date: Support your emotional connection by going on a date, and focus on building your relationship.
10. Share responsibilities: If you're not having sex because you or your partner is burned out or too tired, learn to more evenly balance your responsibilities between you.
There are 3 essential factors to make a good relationship.
1) Love - this is the obvious one but if you have love and are missing either of the other two the relationship will most likely eventually fail.
2) Respect - this is essential in a relationship. You must first respect yourself and you must respect your mate and the choices they make. If you don't respect yourself, how do you expect your mate will respect and appreciate you?
3) Acceptance - Nobody is perfect and there will always be aspects of the other person that you don't particularly like. Perhaps they have habits that drive you nuts but acceptance is the key. You need to be able to accept those less than perfect qualities. If you realize you cannot accept those qualities, you better cut your loses and move on because eventually the relationship will fail.
It's taken me nearly 47 years to realize this. All three of these aspects MUST be present for a good long lasting relationship.
Does 47 years count? If so mine works because I'm married to an angel who always puts me first, never criticises me to anyone, always praises me, in fact I can't think of any faults. Oh yes, she screams and swears at me like a banshee when she loses her temper but its ok because I sometimes ask for it! lol. Nevertheless because she always thinks of me first it makes it easy for me to do the same. To paraphrase John F Kennedy ';Ask not what your partner can do for you, ask what you can do for your partner';
Too many of the present generation have been taught to put themselves first. They ask ';What can you do for me?'; and then wonder why their relationships fail.
communication, sex, trust, a hobby or interest that mutually draws you together, division of labour, sex, financial trust and thrift, a good sense of humour especially being able to laugh at yourself, introspection when neccessary (after a disagreement), mutual respect for each others feelings. and don't forget sex!!.
Shady, you're not an atheist anymore?
Here's my prescription for a happy relationship, though it goes against some common advice: We often here that ';relationships are hard work.'; That advice is a trap. Relationships are easy. If it starts feeling like hard work then something is wrong. When it starts feeling like hard work then that's signal to take some space for yourself, or give some space to your partner. There's no need to butt heads. Instead, take it easy and relax and do something on your own. Let yourself be yourself and have your own life, and same thing for your partner. Enjoy the good times, be content with the boring everyday times, and stay off each others back during difficult times.
It's sort of like having a dog. Is a relationship with a dog hard work? Treat each other like you would treat your own dog; that is, you're happy to see your dog, you pet your dog, you play with your dog, you hang out with your dog, and hopefully you don't kick your dog when you're angry.
Simple as that.
Good luck. -Y
We spend time apart. Many modern day couples seem to feel like they should spend every possible minute with their partner. Often times this can lead to isolation, arguments, fights and other things as they start getting on each others nerves. So we do things separately and still have lives ';outside of the couple.';
Communication. After you get older, sex play very little in a relationship. You form a companionship. Comminicate about ';everything'; - money, family, sex, kids. Open your mouth and talk. Dont let life, sports, tv or FAMILY members run your life.
OPEN YOUR MOUTH AND TALK - IT WORKS
yours truly
';common Joe:
We talk about everything and we have fun together. Our priority is our marriage. If we have a problem we speak up and work it out. We are on the same page about raising the kids, dealing with the in laws, money and sex.
Listening to all the men that I work with, they hide things from their wives, fight about sex and money and some of them cheat. It seems to be a growing trend and marriages like this are not successful.
Well my husband and I we met for sex 11yrs ago. I knew very few people who met like we did. We talked in a chatroom, 2 days later we met up for sex.
We became friends. Somewhere in the mix, we fell in love with each other. 2yrs later he proposed.
2 months after the proposal we moved in together. That's when we really got to know each other. We find out that we actually have more in common then just sex. We do love each other and not just lust each other. We communicate. We respect and trust each other. We also have fun non sexually.
In 2004 my husband was deployed to Iraq. That year he was gone was hard. We missed each other so much, but when he return home our love grew greatly for each other.
Now a days, our sex life is no where near the way it was. But it doesn't have to be for us to be happy. We are happy enough, that sex isn't all that important. We enjoy each other company with that being us hiking, taking pictures, camping, cuddling up watching a movie, simply wrestling around etc..
We accept who we are. We respect each other. I am so proud of him serving our country. He is proud of me. We talk alot about everything. We lend a shoulder to cry/vent to each other.
There are a lot of good answers above that I agree with. I would add that when the times get rough and stressful (because there will be times of immense stress in life), learning to work together through a crisis rather than tearing each other apart is key. You must have each others backs.
I don't know what makes us work, we seem to have nothing in common. But I think about him often, I want to see his smile. He's a great father to my kids and he respects me. He asks my opinion on things and is supportive in everything I do. His faults don't bother me because I see what a good man he is. It helps that I never have to nag him, because he helps without me having to ask.
Knowing that marriage is forever kind of helps. Since I know that man is going to be with me every single day for the rest of my life, I treat him nicer. Think about it....we can make the next forty years pure torture, or we can be loving to each other and make the best of it.
knowing each others and no quickly giving up when a problem arise
a lot of talking AND listing if yo argue no one can be heared.
if we are mad at each other we take 5 min and then give each other a hug and kiss and say i love you and watch a movie or something.
but we had years of practis it take a long time to get it just right for the both.
I consider my marriage a success but I don't think there are any true keys to it. It's all about work...and being honest one may put in more hours than the other:-) But in the end, every marriage has ups and downs and anyone that says their marriage is perfect is lying. You are going to have issues but it's how you resolve them is what counts. To me that's what makes a marriage a success
i don't know the true answer to this but every relationship differs.
for me and my fiance i think it's just that e enjoy each others company, like the same things such as films music foods. ans trust each other so there is no wondering if either of us would stray.
i just think for us we met at the right time in life (early 30's) settling down years
We have a lot of respect/love for each other, always. We have great communication skills....and we work on our marriage. We just don't let it ';idle'; by itself.... Marriage takes work and effort....and the results of such work is an excellent marriage !!! We've had many people recently comment on how they would love to have a marriage/relationship like ours.....so, something we are doing is good !!!!
well mine never last at all but thats because im less comfortable in the bedroom and it takes me longer to get comfortable so they get bored i think that as some of my friends have been in long relationships
its purely because they just found the right person
they do things together like go beach go for walks go cinma etc
and they proberly have a healthy sex life lol
My husband and I are each other's biggest fans and we remind each other of that regularly. We have all the normal pressures of finances, children, work, chores, etc, but we face it as a team working together. Our marriage feels new even though its been 17 years already.
Plenty of sex. Plenty of sexy lingerie.
Im sure that most happy couples will say trust. And they are right. A relationship will never last if you cant trust them 100%. No lies even if it hurts for a minute. And communication!
My wife and I match each other well... for instance Im slightly vain and shes insecure so we compensate for eachothers shortcomings I use my confidance to make sure she knows how great she is and she keeps me from being too conceited
Me and my wife accepted each other for who we are and that we are not going to try to change each other.
be honest, be trueful, know that we wont split up, communication and good sex :D !
Our marriage has worked for almost 40 years purely because my hubby is so tolerant!!!
Serial adultery
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